Showing posts with label hypomania. Show all posts
Showing posts with label hypomania. Show all posts

Comprehensive Revelation


They’ve worked out I’m a cyclist, but not a pedaled clown.
I don’t take ‘roids to speed me up, I use yellows to slow me down
and I need stabilizers still, or I can’t get ‘round corners
without gaining either enemies or self-destructive fawners.
I sashay a land of sinkholes, of glorious gushing geysers;
of embarrassment and excellence in equally enormous sizes.

Every other diag-nonsense has appeared to be just that
but this one fits as snugly as sub-cutaneous fat.
Visceral rage throttles rational thought.
No focus. Too many ideas cavorting.
Spitting out flows to fight my fate.
Racing up and down with no baseline break.

I know it’s medicatable, I know that there is therapy
but redefining thought processes doesn’t seem to work for me.
All this linguistic trickery is far too far innate to me
for all their forms of CBT to make a difference you can see.

I’ll give it another go, you know?
God knows, since the closure of the floatation tank
I’m irrationally rankle-able at an elevated pace.
I’ll go back to star jumps, routines and early starts
to fight off the fidgets, the doldrums and broken hearts.

The mechanics of coping shook their heads in despair
when they saw my brakes in such disrepair
but what state would you be turning up to work in
if your life felt like bungee jumping in a whirlwind?

Nihilistic hedonist, life and soul;

or following the wind up bird into the endless hole.